Essay for
June 2004

Eye of the Needle

An intellectual and/or emotional connection to a perceived creator source is easy enough to attain. But a real sense of permanent connection that has directional depth, free of intellectual and emotional content, can be elusive. Permanent, in this sense, means free of constructs and beliefs imposing a 'how to' do it process. Is is possible to achieve a perpetual feeling-centered connection to a creator source beyond constructs, beliefs and the subliminal patterns they install?

That question is at the heart of existence, and is the eye of the needle. A permanent connection to your source of existence — a greater sense of Presence beyond your own sense of presence — is achievable. But how do you discover it beyond constructs, beliefs and internal patterns? Pure and simple faith, if not based upon restrictive beliefs or constructs, will take you there. Faith is unrestricted and requires nothing beyond itself. But beliefs and constructs easily color and restrict that faith within the borders they create, potentially blocking the eye of the needle. The constructs, and the belief in the constructs, are the baggage and the block. This is not implying that the constructs and beliefs are incorrect or not supportive, just extra baggage, preventing you from slipping through the eye. Pure and simple faith, if held and practiced with honest simplicity and sincerity, directly connects your sense of presence to a greater sense of Presence. How you respond to that connection creates your personal spiritual evolution.

A pure faith normally begins as a belief-faith, containing the grand duality of restriction (beliefs and constructs) and non-restriction (faith). Through another process this duality is also referred to as the gateless-gate. Pure faith (no constructs or beliefs) is totality unrestricted, and so is Presence. The connection between your sense of presence and that sense of Presence — if existing in an absolute unrestricted atmosphere, perfectly resonate — cannot be grasped or held on to in any manner. There is then nothing impinging upon that form of unrestricted faith, and passing through the eye of needle is effortless. A belief-faith has then metamorphosed into a knowing-faith.

The other process leading towards a knowing-faith is an intellectual slog. Rather than using beliefs or constructs to support your endeavor, they are all ruthlessly abandoned. It can be a fiery trial, as you begin by doubting everything. After years of heart wrenching processing the doubt ultimately dissolve:; your intellect creating its own pathways to an understanding-feeling connection to Presence. This process is passing through the gateless-gate.

Presence (God, Allah or Buddha) is not waiting, demanding or interfering in any manner. It is right at this precise point where the gateless-gate both begins and ends. No one anywhere can pull, push or coerce you through the gate. You can stand on the threshold of the gateless-gate your entire life, never getting through, not realizing the gate is wide open. It is here where duality ends, it is also where it has its beginning.

The feeling connection that has a permanent directional depth does not occur as learning. It only occurs when the last vestige of an independent sense of learner — I know — is gone. With that going, you are standing on the threshold of the gateless-gate, totally empty handed, with no one there to interpret the knowing. In this circumstance only, the sense of pure knowing is experientially different from 'I-know', as the interpreting 'I' is gone. At that position Presence is present, as the gate is gone. It was the independent knowing-I that created the gate, and when that 'knowing-I' is gone so is the gate, but the knowing remains. The knowing is now by the pure knower free of borders and self-imposed restriction. This form of knowing is a pure feeling connection that settles within an unrestricted sense of knowing permanence. It is knowing-faith that becomes who you are. The knower of your sense of presence is now in absolute resonate accord with the Knower of Presence. This very personal connection changes your life forever. It is everything you could imagine and more.

Your initial doubt has been transformed into a knowing-faith that has no 'I' interpreting what is felt and known. With that 'I' no longer present you are liberated from all its wants and desires, resulting in clarity of insight and a knowingly purposeful direction.

A knowing-faith, initiated by intellectual inquiry, appears when the inquiry ultimately self-destructs. But the inquiry will never end as long as there is an independent-I present to process the feeling connection. The processing always returns itself to some form of restrictive understanding, ultimately imprisoning the unrestricted connective feeling. The restriction revives the interpreting knowing-I, and the games begins again.

A belief-faith, as opposed to an intellectual induced knowing-faith, is converted to a knowing-faith with the support and security of constructs and beliefs. But those constructs and beliefs contain the potential to block the very thing they are attempting to achieve. An intellectually generated knowing-faith has no security and safety, and this is where problems materialize, potentially devouring the inquiring individual. Eventually, both an intellectually generated knowing-faith and a belief-faith converted to a knowing-faith arrive at the same position. And both have difficulty appreciating that the other is there.

Standing on the threshold of the gateless-gate, with no constructs or beliefs — without any form of armor and without waiting for or expecting anything — the gate is standing open, as it always has. It is here that an experiential connection to Presence is discoverable. But no one can suggest or tell you precisely how to do it, as there is no one way. And telling you how to enter the open gate can potentially become the barrier to the discovery that is has always been open. At this position, from within your own internal silence, the great, apparent silent void speaks, announcing its Presence within the silence by the silence and as the silence. It is up to you to recognize the silent speech, as it is not possible for another to do it for you. The silence is Presence. It stops right there with nothing added, as the silence contains both the personal and impersonal environment of Presence. The recognition of the personal within the impersonal is the discovery of activated primordial awareness, as that which now constitutes your consciousness awareness. This is a feeling-knowing connection that is permanent and never alters. Or it is the purity of individual consciousness resonating with Absolute Consciousness, not as but same as, in its construction. That is the connection, its personal, directional and where pure trust is born, develops and extends.

Expressed another way, normal daily life unfolds within your family, social, work, political, economic, religious or moral and ethical structure allowing your survival constructs to surface and dominate your existence. Within this constant demand upon your attention it is very easy to lose the connective thread of your existence. When it comes time to thread the needle, it cannot occur, as the thread it missing. When and if you do discover a connective thread, your own adopted and created constructs equally prevent you from threading the needle, as the needle is there, but the eye cannot be found.

The problem is the eye, as that 'I' does not exist. The independent-I is attempting to take the connective thread through itself, as it created the needle and is now searching for a place to thread a connection. Both the needle and the eye-I are a created illusion. The search by the illusion sustains the 'I', which is deceitful and a delusion, as it supports the continuance of an illusion. The independent-I illusion creates the self-constructed needle maintaining its own existence. The eye of the needle will never be discovered no matter how hard and long one may look, as both the needle and the eye-I are an illusion supported and maintained by a deceitful delusion that the independent-I is real. And that is the gate of the gateless-gate.

To suggest stop searching is incorrect, as the search is necessary for the needle to exist, allowing you to discover the illusion of a non-existent eye-I. To suggest that you continue your search is equally incorrect, as it always leads away from what you are attempting to discover. This is the paradox of the gateless-gate. Getting through it is the discovery of the eye of needle by letting go of both the needle and the eye-I. In the letting to you discover the knowing aspect of consciousness that did the letting go. That realization creates an evolutionary revelation, shifting your existential focus from in to out. It is within this internal clarity that you willing allow the very personal environment of Presence to percolate into your existence, as your existence. It is a clear yes or no, with no in-between.

If you have chosen a belief-faith pathway your course has been set. If followed with internal honesty and sincerity you will arrive at your destination. If you follow an intellectually generated knowing-faith pathway, arriving at your destination can be fraught with derailments. These derailments are all duality entrapment generated, which is the subject matter of next month's essay.

Both a belief-faith and an intellectually generated knowing-faith are like two rail lines running parallel to each other. They never touch, but each line takes the travelers to their required destination, which is the same station. Ideally, the two tracks become one, and you reach your destination quicker with no derailments.

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